Zen And The Art Of Being Cunty

There's some days which are just some of those days.

You woke up and your back hurts, you have a migraine, your mouth tastes like shit. There was no coffee in the house, your spouse/partner/roommate forgot to get it or you did. They also treated you like a stinky crap filled doormat with a badly drawn snowman on, cause they are having a bad day too. You didnt answer cause you have to live with them and if you DID answer, it would mean days and days of silent torture or ear scorching bitching, and your stomach hurts enough without that.

So you went to a bar and you overheard people having a conversation on how niggger-fag-commiues are the reason for everything wrong in this world, and how if it was for them they would shoot everyone. Also women are all bitches. But you didnt intervene in the argument cause they never learn, theyre not designed to do so. Also they have way much more free time than you do and seem to love spending it arguing the same points over and over and over until you want to die.
So you just went in line and tried to pay your coffee, and dodged an old lady who had to tell te cashier about her dog Waldo's diarrhea problems. And when you asked her nicely if she could let you pas, she snarked at you and called you a rude youngster, while the cashier went on a break.

You got to work and the computer had a system failure, thanks windows. No one in the whole fucking office seemed to know how to fix things and were all waiting for you to do it. So while the boss screams at you to go faster, unless you want to go work somewhere else and your coworkers laugh behind your back, including the illiterate secretary who basically has her desk cause she has a gaping vagina the size of Kentucky.

After five system restorings, you give up and call tech support, where they are as stressed as you are and neither of you has the strength or will to solve the issue. Plus you have a waiting call from your mother which just needs to tell you what a sad disappointment you are, no matter what you do or say.

Many would say that the right path for you would be to be a bigger person, take the higher road, react with calm and a smile, act zen like, shrug it off. But people who say that are often unemployed or always had their road paved with other people's corpses. They have no fucking idea.

So feel free, for once and for all: be an asshole. Mistreat people, answer rudely, tell your mom to shut the fuck up, have a field day, do not feel bad.

You have the right to get angry once. You have the right to be selfish, cruel and mean. You OWE to yourself to tell people to back off and learn how to figure out shit on their own. To ask for things and call people idiots if they dont get them. Yes, society needs tolerance but piling up stuff inside burns up your soul. So, youre allowed to be openly snarky and abrasive and NOT feel bad or guilty. Fuck them. You have given your part, been there for everyone and been a delightful person. Now its your turn to make a few days ugly and miserable. Its your little present to yourself.

Then you can go back to being a good person, if you want. Lighter, like a butterfly who just had a giant smelly dump.