martedì 17 maggio 2011

The Magnificiousliness Of Nature

Yesterday, a lot of my frienbds and contacts were staring at the sky by proxy, admiring the beauty of the universe and the vastity of the skies. Which means they were in front of a computer looking at the Nasa launch.

I am far from being one of those potato headed individuals who think feeling awe and wonders for nature and science is stupid. I honestly think that allowing such individuals to reproduce is a crime against humanity and slowly causing society to creep backwards to a state of mentally challenged, inbred ignorance that will evntually cause humanity to either die off of sheer uselessness (which is my hope) or just become a society ruled by morons who exploit the intelligent ones.

Besides the ranting, which i really needed to feel better, i am also interested in the magnificience of nature and its weirdest creations. Some of them even went unnoticed by serious scientitsts, anbd i feel aits my duty to point them out. Weird creature, no researcher seems to pay attention to but are there...

- The PhotoShopimals

These weird cretaures seem to be all over the world, beinhg constantly photographed and exposed on websites, while no one appears to know anything on their behaviors or where they live. A few examples that come to mind are the Crippo (which you can see in this post main pic, as its photographed by a farmer in Kwalazambefelewa), part crab, part hippo, the Sharkitten, a very dangerous cross between a kitten and a shark, which seems to breed only by full moon, when kittens have sex with sharks on the shores of the isle of Qqwhevfcugwaeu and which are only photographed in a static position with jaws wide open. Less diffused but still present are Parrotdog and Tigerbunny.

- The SciFiChannelmals

An unwritten and unpublished study has pointed out a relationship between thjose magnificient examples of nature's will to exploit the DirectToDvd market and the Photoshopmals. The difference is that while the Photoshopmals are usually harmless and usually only portrayed in pictures, The SciFiChannelmals are aggressive, want to conquer the world, feed only on humans, planes and boats, fight each other a lot and love to be filmed for documentaries that are usually shown on the Sci Fi Channel for drunk nerds. One of the fiercest examples of this breed is Sharktopus, tremendous fighter (some even call him "the Hulk Hogan of the species"). His throne might be in danger after the newly sightings of the infamous OctoBunny....

- The CuteOverloadians

Many scientists have confused this breed with a series of baby kittens, dogs, rabbits or other small animals. It has been proven by the never seen reaserch studies of Non Existent Expert Professsor Hufurhurrur, that in reality the CuiteOverlloadians are a much bleaker reality.

Affected by a rare form of genetical dwarfism, the CuteOverlodians never reach adult size and develop an oversized intelligence. Plagued by the inability of survival in their natural habitat, they decide to use their appearance to exploit the internet market, and sell their looks to ruthless photogrpahers. The Cuteoverlodians pornography market is a sad business. Some become professionals, unionized and star in movies but most of them are condemened to a whole existence of cheap uncredited photoshots in basements, for which their paid with counterfeit Cheeseburgers, the infamous Cheezeburgerz.

It has also been found and proven that some CuteOverloadians are drugged with the terrible substance Didascalia, a drug that forces them to express in mispelled english.

Action groups have tried to save the Overloadians from their sore fate but the main customers of the market seem to not care. as quoted in the research an anonymous customer has declared "SQUEEEE LOLZ!!!111111"

Add your findings, scientists.

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